17 thoughts I had in a Bikram yoga class

17 thoughts I had in a Bikram yoga class
  1. Oh my god it smells so bad in here. Like really REALLY bad. It smells like a blend of BO and feet.
  1. It’s so hot. I didn’t expect it to be THIS hot.
  1. I can’t breathe.
bikram
Who doesn’t love the smell of feet, B.O and balls first thing in the morning?
  1. Why did I think this was a good idea? How long does this go for? An hour and a half? I am going to die. I am actually going to die in this smelly room.
  1. Did she just say I can’t leave until the end of the class? Why can’t I leave? Maybe I can just sneak out now… Shit, the instructor is looking at me.
  1. Okay I am doing this. Uh I’m sweating already. There are beads of sweat running down my cleavage.
  1. Hmmm I really need a pedicure.
  1. Why is that woman sweating SO much? I wonder if she is okay… I’ve never seen someone sweat like that… OMG her whole towel/mat/clothing is wet. It looks like a shower is running above her. Should I be sweating like that? Don’t stare at the sweaty woman.
  1. Aaaaaand I’m staring.
  1. I think I’m going to faint. Or vomit. Or both. I’m just going to lie down.
  1. Okay I’m lying down, should start to feel a bit better… NOPE IT’S STILL FUCKING HOT. Do you think I can ask to turn on a fan????????
GIF-Yoga
Truth.
  1. How much longer? WHY DO YOGA STUDIOS NEVER HAVE CLOCKS?
  1. Is that woman wearing a swimming costume?
  1. If I haven’t lost at least 5 kilos I’m going to kill this yogi b*tch.
  1. DID SHE SAY LAST POSE? I LITERALLY HAVE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY IN MY LIFE.

16. FRESH AIR. I HAVE MISSED YOU.

  1. That wasn’t so bad. I think I’ll go back next week.